6 years ago I went in for a routine check-up at my doctor’s office. While waiting for the nurse to call my name I started to sweat. I knew as soon as the nurse called me back there that the first thing she was going to do was check my weight. The scale and I weren’t (and still aren’t, really) very good friends. Just as I feared when the nurse called me back she said, “Let’s get your weight real quick.” Sounds so harmless, right? I reluctantly stepped on the scale and as much as I tried to look away, I couldn’t. I saw the numbers. Staring me right in the face. I stepped off with tears in my eyes. How could I let myself get to this point? Thoughts of self-loathing filled my head. I was tired of feeling this way and I decided right then and there that I was going to get in shape. At that time, I did not know the difference between “getting in shape” and being healthy. I made a plan. It wasn’t a very good plan.
I started working out at various intensities 6-7 days a week. I started cutting all of my food portions in half. I was dropping about 3 pounds a week. I got on the scale every Friday and was delighted to see that that number kept getting smaller and smaller. When I looked at myself, I was happy to see myself getting thinner but thought I had more work to do. When other people looked at me, they saw a woman slowly destroying herself from the inside out. Family, friends, and co-workers started getting concerned. They thought I needed to eat more, that I was too skinny. I brushed off and thought to myself that they didn’t know what they were talking about.
One day at work I was discussing business matters with a co-worker. In the middle of us debriefing about a client she stopped me mid-sentence and said, “You know that you’re starving yourself, right?” That hit me like a ton of bricks. What was she talking about? I still ate, I just cut everything in half! I left the room and went to the restroom and looked in the mirror. And that was when I saw it. I really saw it. My complexion was gray. I could see my spine through the back of my shirt. I wasn’t just too skinny. I was astonishingly unhealthy. I was sick. I decided that enough was enough. I was going to stop punishing my body and eat more. I discovered a passion for helping people like me and became a personal trainer. I completely changed my eating habits and changed the way I worked out.
Instead of working out to get skinny, I started working out to improve the way my body performed!
And do you want to know the craziest thing of all? I weigh EXACTLY THE SAME now as I did in the beginning of this story! I just have a totally different body now that’s healthy and strong.
I’m telling you this story because I know I’m not the only one who has put her self-worth on the scale. I’m here to tell you that the scale doesn’t matter. Not one bit. Throw your scale out the window and stop obsessing on what you weigh. Stop focusing on what eating and working out do for your appearance. When I started focusing on what my amazing, beautiful body can do, I found true freedom.
You are worth more than a number on a scale! Tell me what your amazing, beautiful body can do.